Pretending Not to Know

Spark #358 - We don't forget it. We bury it.

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We already know. We just don’t let ourselves say it.

Because if we admit we know, we’d have to do something about it.

We’d have to admit the conversation we keep not having.
Or the thing we need to start, or finally stop.

Here’s the deal. We don’t forget it.
We pretend it’s not there.
And we stay busy, really busy.

The truth doesn’t disappear because we ignore it. It waits.

Then it shows up in the tension in our neck, in a sleepless night.

I know this first hand. For years I thought I was just super driven. I said no to invitations, to friendships I could have deepened. I hid behind my work. And it cost me.

Facing it stings.
The truth always does.

Trust me, the lie hurts more.

So to stay honest with myself, I do this monthly practice.

I write the following question at the top of a page of my journal. Then I sit with it until I get to that truth-filled sting.

What am I pretending not to know?

✨P.S. I go deeper into this in my latest video, including the part of my own story I left out here. [Watch Sparked on YouTube].