Cara! What a courageous undertaking. About a year ago, after 38 years of active recovery from alcoholism, I began recognizing and working on my codependent behavior. I too, feel like I’m walking down the street naked. My armor is falling off, piece by piece, exposing someone I’m just getting to know. What a blessing it is to have resources and people around to help us on this remarkable journey!
Thank you Kimble. I sat on this post for a few weeks not sure if I’d publish it. As you well know, the process of awakening is not for the faint of heart.
Happier - that is so important. I can relate - over the last few years I just stopped doing things that I thought I was supposed to do but just didn't like - like podcasts. I thought I was supposed to do them - along with other social media. I finally stopped. I enjoy the writing on Substack so that is the only thing I now do. No other social media, no podcasts etc. Just the writing. Thank you again Cara for putting this into words.
Heather, we’ve been walking along this Substack path together for some time now. It’s not be easy. New friendships like yours has made it worth the ride.
I second what Peggy said - this is a courageous undertaking. It isn't easy to ask hard questions. But when I do, there is something in me that knows I need to hear the answer to it. And there is something in me that knows the process and undertaking that is required to experience that answer. I'm thankful that is not the voice I listen to, but the one that longs for authenticity, integrity and connection with life and myself! I am willing.
“I am willing.” Wow Julie, that stopped my breath. What a beautiful offering. I will adopt it immediately. Thank you for your grounded word of wisdom. You are a gift.
Thank you for sharing your courageous personal experience. This really speaks to me. So now I am sitting with how I want and need to do this also. 💗 With much gratitude. 🙏
Cara, "Where in my life am I still performing or pretending?" is a brave question to ask once, never mind every day for a year. What strikes me is where you ended up: not a better performer, but softer and happier, with the ground still moving. Most of us assume we have to be certain who we are before we can be at peace with it. You seem to have found it the other way round.
Definitely resonating with me & walking the same journey alongside you…before I read your post, I deleted a message to someone explaining (or should I say over explaining) myself for something I did. Delete! No need to explain myself. Unnecessary & exhausting. That is something I am working on!
Terrifying. That’s a good way of putting it. Not for the faint of heart which is why most remain stuck (and seemingly comfortable) in outdated ways of being.
Cara! What a courageous undertaking. About a year ago, after 38 years of active recovery from alcoholism, I began recognizing and working on my codependent behavior. I too, feel like I’m walking down the street naked. My armor is falling off, piece by piece, exposing someone I’m just getting to know. What a blessing it is to have resources and people around to help us on this remarkable journey!
Gosh Peggy, this path ain’t easy! And good for you for having the courage to continue to peel back the layers.
Thank you for your vulnerability Cara! This was so raw and real.
Sometimes the ground shaking beneath us is exactly what we need to get out of a rut and leap forward ✨️
Thank you Kimble. I sat on this post for a few weeks not sure if I’d publish it. As you well know, the process of awakening is not for the faint of heart.
Thank you for writing this. I love it when a post sounds as necessary to write as it is to hear. ❤️💪🏻.
Oof. That’s spot on Mark. I’ve been sitting on this one for a few weeks. It’s raw and from my gut.
Sounds like it, feels like it! Keep being you. We're all the better for it. ❤️
Happier - that is so important. I can relate - over the last few years I just stopped doing things that I thought I was supposed to do but just didn't like - like podcasts. I thought I was supposed to do them - along with other social media. I finally stopped. I enjoy the writing on Substack so that is the only thing I now do. No other social media, no podcasts etc. Just the writing. Thank you again Cara for putting this into words.
Heather, we’ve been walking along this Substack path together for some time now. It’s not be easy. New friendships like yours has made it worth the ride.
Can't agree more
I second what Peggy said - this is a courageous undertaking. It isn't easy to ask hard questions. But when I do, there is something in me that knows I need to hear the answer to it. And there is something in me that knows the process and undertaking that is required to experience that answer. I'm thankful that is not the voice I listen to, but the one that longs for authenticity, integrity and connection with life and myself! I am willing.
I just love this Cara! 💜
“I am willing.” Wow Julie, that stopped my breath. What a beautiful offering. I will adopt it immediately. Thank you for your grounded word of wisdom. You are a gift.
I’m deeply touched… 💜🙏💜
Cara, I'm glad to hear that you're in a happier place that feels right for you :)
Thank you Melanie. Still in the fire I must say. The process is not over.
Sure thing. Is it ever really?
Thank you for sharing your courageous personal experience. This really speaks to me. So now I am sitting with how I want and need to do this also. 💗 With much gratitude. 🙏
Thank you for reading. Sending you well wishes are you embark on this path. I’m rooting for you.
I love knowing I'm not alone. Thank you, Cara, for articulating beautifully what I've been going through -- and continue to go through. ❤️
Thanks Sue. Glad to know there are others in the fire with me.
I love this!!
Thank you Honey.
That is so bold! And you did it! Go you!
Thank you Carrie. It’s ongoing and so, so hard.
Cara, "Where in my life am I still performing or pretending?" is a brave question to ask once, never mind every day for a year. What strikes me is where you ended up: not a better performer, but softer and happier, with the ground still moving. Most of us assume we have to be certain who we are before we can be at peace with it. You seem to have found it the other way round.
Thank you for your wise and kind words. It seems like the deeper I go the softer I feel.
Definitely resonating with me & walking the same journey alongside you…before I read your post, I deleted a message to someone explaining (or should I say over explaining) myself for something I did. Delete! No need to explain myself. Unnecessary & exhausting. That is something I am working on!
It can be a hard and oftentimes lonely path. Glad to know you're walking along with me. And, good going on deleting that email. Enough is enough.
Wow. That is so impressive. Really good for me to hear right now too.
Oh Jane, we could have been having this convo in person!
I know. It will happen though 😀
I’m right there with you. It’s terrifying to become a new person and not have an infrastructure to support it.
Terrifying. That’s a good way of putting it. Not for the faint of heart which is why most remain stuck (and seemingly comfortable) in outdated ways of being.
I hope to be as brave as you are as I head down this path.
We are in this together.